This section will outline a valuable plan on how to increase your company's assets at no cost. Note that it is not low cost, but i'm speaking for virtually NO cost! For free!Steps to Follow:
1) Lure an unsuspecting employee/worker/slave to request for financial aid in procuring what they believe will be a personal item. (In this case, it was a laptop.)
2) Remain vague about the terms of "loan" and do not write done anything in black and white.
3) If you have the O3 environment in place, the consistent change of decisions and policies will help you greatly later. If not, start manipulating and changing your procurement policies for employees now. Change them at least 3 times a week and always with different staff to add to the level of confusion.
4) Once the item has been purchased using the "loan" from the company. Secretely deduct the amount from the employee's paycheck for the next month but keep the item in use in the company and do not allow it to leave the building.
5) When confronted about the supposed "loan", scream and shout profanities. This will reduce the employee's desire to pursue the matter. Say that such important/high-tech items must remain for company use only since the company had to pay (albeit temporarily) for the item.
6) Remain upset at the employee and threaten to fire him/her. This aids in permanently shutting them up. If he/she repeatedly questions the matter, initiate a 10% pay cut. That would definitely shut them up.
So there you go. Although this scenario in this O3 environment involved a laptop, it would in principle apply to office stationery, IT equipment, pantry food, water, and even the air they breathe. Give it a try!
6 comments:
hehehe... are you sure you're working in an O3 environment or is this thing just make believe!?! this is hilarious! :)
Dear Anon,
I know that tons of people simply do not believe that this place I work in exists. But it's all true. My esteemed and bullied collegues find this site a comic relief to the O3 environment we suffer in daily.
Sure makes just about any other work place spiffy eh?
=)
Surely you can choose to leave the organisation if you are so unhappy working in O3.
Hi, the O3 environment has been sinisterly filled with many foreign workers who need the "employment pass" in order to remain in the country.
Of course you are correct, we are looking for other jobs. As such, this O3 company has the highest turnover of jobs i have ever witnessed.
Good luck with your job hunt! Happy New Year too.
I can be a judge to what LJ says about the O3 environment. I've been there longer and have seen much more 'victims' being exploited by BB and MB and also da BITCH.
The thing is, BB actually offerred me the "LOAN U $$ TO BUY PC" scheme which I declined. I knew precisely how evil BB's plan was to make unknowing victims fall into the trap so he can torment them for as long as he wants.
I have loads of HORROR stories to tell and I'm sure ex-O3 elites have too!
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